Correction /éducation
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Message de dadoush35 posté le 20-03-2016 à 11:40:33 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous!
J'ai un débat à faire sur l'éducation; je dois défendre le fait que l'éducation est un droit pour tous. Pourriez-vous me dire ce que vous pensez de mes arguments et corriger les erreurs s'il vous plait ?
Je vous remercie beaucoup!
Developped countries are, by definition, countries where the majority of the population have an acces to all her vital needs but also to a certain comfort and education. So the presence of education reflects the good image from a country.
It’s an handicap not to know writing or reading. In fact, today it’s essential to have this knowledge if you want to find a job, to comunicate with the new technologies for example. They are skills asked by everyone in a large nomber of fields. That’s why today, a lot of associations are created to help population disadvantaged all around the world. They collect funds and invit people to do voluntary work in order to built schools or to enable children to recieve leassons. Poverty is a brake for the education.
Jules Ferry created state and free school in France to enable all the children to have a facilitated access to this fundamental right and that proves that education should be a right for everyone.
Education is a way to build a society of idea and to make evolve the society. A society needs someone at her head and a person with knowledge will have the power to change a lot of thing and it’s for example thanks to that knowledge that reforms for education are done.
Conclusion : According to this discussion, we are all agree to say that education is actually a priviledge and a Human right at the same time.
Merci beaucoup!
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Modifié par lucile83 le 20-03-2016 11:47
Message de dadoush35 posté le 20-03-2016 à 11:40:33 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous!
J'ai un débat à faire sur l'éducation; je dois défendre le fait que l'éducation est un droit pour tous. Pourriez-vous me dire ce que vous pensez de mes arguments et corriger les erreurs s'il vous plait ?
Je vous remercie beaucoup!
Developped countries are, by definition, countries where the majority of the population have an acces to all her vital needs but also to a certain comfort and education. So the presence of education reflects the good image from a country.
It’s an handicap not to know writing or reading. In fact, today it’s essential to have this knowledge if you want to find a job, to comunicate with the new technologies for example. They are skills asked by everyone in a large nomber of fields. That’s why today, a lot of associations are created to help population disadvantaged all around the world. They collect funds and invit people to do voluntary work in order to built schools or to enable children to recieve leassons. Poverty is a brake for the education.
Jules Ferry created state and free school in France to enable all the children to have a facilitated access to this fundamental right and that proves that education should be a right for everyone.
Education is a way to build a society of idea and to make evolve the society. A society needs someone at her head and a person with knowledge will have the power to change a lot of thing and it’s for example thanks to that knowledge that reforms for education are done.
Conclusion : According to this discussion, we are all agree to say that education is actually a priviledge and a Human right at the same time.
Merci beaucoup!
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 20-03-2016 11:47
Réponse: Correction /éducation de gerondif, postée le 21-03-2016 à 15:40:11 (S | E)
Bonjour,
erreurs en bleu, corrections en vert.
Developped countries are, by definition, countries where the majority of the population have(majority est singulier) an acces to all her(their) vital needs but also to a certain comfort and education. So the presence of education reflects the good image from a country.
It’s an handicap not to know writing or reading(ne se dit guère. it's a handicap if you can't read or write). In fact, today it’s essential to have this knowledge(maladroit . It's essential to know this) if you want to find a job, to comunicate with the new technologies for example. They are skills asked by everyone in a large nomber of fields. That’s why today, a lot of associations are created to help population disadvantaged (inverser) all around the world. They collect funds and invit people to do voluntary work in order to built schools or to enable children to recieve leassons. Poverty is a brake for (to) the education.
Jules Ferry created state and free school in France to enable all the children to have a facilitated access to this fundamental right and that proves that education should be a right for everyone.
Education is a way to build a society of ideas and to make evolve the society (inverser). A society needs someone at her head and a person with knowledge will have the power to change a lot of things and it’s for example thanks to that knowledge that reforms for education are done.
Conclusion : According to this discussion, we
Réponse: Correction /éducation de dadoush35, postée le 23-03-2016 à 11:17:09 (S | E)
Bonjour, j'ai corrigé mes erreurs et je suis passé à l'oral pour ce travail, voilà ce que j'ai dis :
Developped countries are, by definition, countries where the majority of the population has an access to all their vital needs but also to a certain comfort and education. So the presence of education reflects the good image of a country.
It's a handicap if you can't read or write. In fact, today it’s essential to know this if you want to find a job, to communicate with the new technologies for example. They are skills asked by everyone in a large number of fields. That’s why today, a lot of associations are created to help disadvantaged population all around the world. They collect funds and invite people to do voluntary work in order to built schools or to enable children to receive leasons. Poverty is a brake to education.
Jules Ferry created state and free school in France to enable all the children to have a facilitated access to this fundamental right and that proves that education should be a right for everyone.
Education is a way to build a society of ideas and to make the society evolve. A society needs someone at his head and a person with knowledge will have the power to change a lot of things and it’s for example thanks to that knowledge that reforms for education are done.
Conclusion : According to this discussion, we all agree to say that education is actually a privilege and a Human right at the same time.
Merci beaucoup pour cette correction!
A bientôt !
Réponse: Correction /éducation de gerondif, postée le 23-03-2016 à 14:49:37 (S | E)
Hello,
il y avait encore quelques erreurs, certaines que j'ai laissé passer lors de ma première correction. Vous me direz combien vous avez eu, si c'était noté.
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