Essai/ vérification
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Message de ohhnaeqo posté le 28-10-2015 à 20:30:15 (S | E | F)
Hello !
j'ai eu pour devoir un essai qui porte sur le texte "A remarkable trip" tiré de l'oeuvre de Daniel Mendelsohn "The Lost" . La consigne était la suivante : "One day,the narrator in document 2 asks Sylvia about her version of the story. It turns out completely different. Imagine their conversation.
J'aimerais savoir si ce que j'ai fait était satisfaisant,je ne suis pas très bon en anglais mais j'aimerais m'améliorer et pour m'améliorer, j'aimerais connaître les points sur lesquels je dois travailler.
Merci pour vos réponses.
-Aunt Sylvia?
-yes,honey?
-You know,i'm thinking about something. Grandfather told me the story of the trip you did to america,but,i don't know your version of the story? Explain me please.
-Uhh,you know,i don't like to remember me these times,it was,hard.
-REALLY? Grandfather took it lightly when he was explaining the story.
-Ahah,you know your grandfather,he's to gentle.What do you know about this trip?
-He told me that you took the boat,the train,you had been traveling many cities and countries,you had begun from Bolechow,to Lwow,Warsaw then Rotterdam in Netherlands,where a boat took you to America..
-I think,he didn't wan't to show you that he had endured so many problems at this period?
-Oh.. like?
-Sorry honey,you know,it's something that i don't like to talk about..
-Please Aunt Sylvia,I know the meaning of the situation,but,a don't want to live in the lie with my grandfather.
-Well,it was horrible.It was a really small, train,people were agressed by other people,you need to find the food but we didn't had hany money on us,you must add on it the people who tried to steal what you had,fortunaly,your grandfather was here to have an eye on me..
-Oh my god.. Thank you god for saves my grandfather and his sister..
-Yes,thanks of the god,we had escaped from the hell..To join this beautiful country which it U.S.A,and to create our lifes.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 28-10-2015 21:57
Message de ohhnaeqo posté le 28-10-2015 à 20:30:15 (S | E | F)
Hello !
j'ai eu pour devoir un essai qui porte sur le texte "A remarkable trip" tiré de l'oeuvre de Daniel Mendelsohn "The Lost" . La consigne était la suivante : "One day,the narrator in document 2 asks Sylvia about her version of the story. It turns out completely different. Imagine their conversation.
J'aimerais savoir si ce que j'ai fait était satisfaisant,je ne suis pas très bon en anglais mais j'aimerais m'améliorer et pour m'améliorer, j'aimerais connaître les points sur lesquels je dois travailler.
Merci pour vos réponses.
-Aunt Sylvia?
-yes,honey?
-You know,i'm thinking about something. Grandfather told me the story of the trip you did to america,but,i don't know your version of the story? Explain me please.
-Uhh,you know,i don't like to remember me these times,it was,hard.
-REALLY? Grandfather took it lightly when he was explaining the story.
-Ahah,you know your grandfather,he's to gentle.What do you know about this trip?
-He told me that you took the boat,the train,you had been traveling many cities and countries,you had begun from Bolechow,to Lwow,Warsaw then Rotterdam in Netherlands,where a boat took you to America..
-I think,he didn't wan't to show you that he had endured so many problems at this period?
-Oh.. like?
-Sorry honey,you know,it's something that i don't like to talk about..
-Please Aunt Sylvia,I know the meaning of the situation,but,a don't want to live in the lie with my grandfather.
-Well,it was horrible.It was a really small, train,people were agressed by other people,you need to find the food but we didn't had hany money on us,you must add on it the people who tried to steal what you had,fortunaly,your grandfather was here to have an eye on me..
-Oh my god.. Thank you god for saves my grandfather and his sister..
-Yes,thanks of the god,we had escaped from the hell..To join this beautiful country which it U.S.A,and to create our lifes.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 28-10-2015 21:57
Réponse: Essai/ vérification de here4u, postée le 28-10-2015 à 21:12:47 (S | E)
Hello !
-Aunt Sylvia?
-yes,honey?
-You know,i
'm thinking about something. Grandfather told me the story of the trip you did to america,but,i don't know your version(side) of the story? Explain me (construction fausse)please.-Uhh,you know,i don't like to remember me these times,it was,hard.
-REALLY? Grandfather took it lightly when he was explaining the story.
-Ahah,you know your grandfather,he's to gentle.What do you know about this trip?
-He told me that you took the boat,the train,you had been traveling XXXXXXX (missing element)many cities and countries,you had begun from Bolechow,to Lwow,Warsaw then Rotterdam in XXX Netherlands,where a boat took you to America..
-I think,he didn't wan't to show you that he had endured so many problems at this period?
-Oh.. like?
-Sorry honey,you know,it's something that i don't like to talk about..
-Please Aunt Sylvia,I know the meaning of the situation,but,a don't want to live in the lie with my grandfather.
-Well,it was horrible.It was a really small, train,people were agressed by other people,you need (tense)to find the food but we didn't had
hany money on us,you must add on it
the people who tried to steal what you had,fortunaly,your grandfather was here to have an eye on me..-Oh my god.. Thank you god for saves(construction + tense) my grandfather and his sister..
-Yes,thanks of the god,we had escaped from the hell..To join this beautiful country which it XXXU.S.A,and to create our lifes.
Courage !
Réponse: Essai/ vérification de ohhnaeqo, postée le 28-10-2015 à 21:47:26 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup! Bonne soirée
Réponse: Essai/ vérification de here4u, postée le 29-10-2015 à 09:06:28 (S | E)
Hello
Il est agréable de voir le texte une fois les corrections suggérées faites ...
( entre autres raisons pour être certain d'avoir bien été compris ... ) Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais
