Devoir/correction
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Message de pepito03 posté le 24-09-2012 à 00:53:53 (S | E | F)
Bonjour! (:
Pouvez-vous m'aider à corriger mon travail s'il vous plaît ?
Merci pour vos réponses.
Le sujet: Do you think that parents should interfere with their children's decisions? (in 300 words)
consigne:
1/ Ne répondez pas à la question dès l'introduction.
2/ Dans le développement, vous devez nuancer votre propos et donner des exemples.
I think that every parent ask themselves the same question and I also think that there's no good answer but we all have different points of view on this topical subject, so here's mine.
Firstly, I am well aware that it's great to have advices from people who have experience. If parents don't force their children to follow what they said, this can be really benefic for them, especially when they need to take important decisions like for example: the decision of keeping or not a baby when the daughter is pregnant while she's just in high school. Secondly, I'm totally agreed with the fact that parents have to participate in their children's life but they have to keep their privacy. Sometimes parents don't respect that. They try to control their children's life so much, that they come to a point where they can't speak to each other anymore without arguing. So personally, I am convinced that parents shouldn't interfere with their children's decisions. I think that parents should let their children live their life, make their own mistakes and take their independence little by little so that they will be ready for their future, without their parents behind them. Anyway, when the children will come to their majority, they will have to leave the house of their parents and live their own life and their parents cannot avoid this.
In conclusion, parents are important in children life. They need to have advice from their parents even if they choose to not follow them. They need to feel accompanied and not watched. Parents need to trust their children. They have to let them take their own decisions, without letting them fall.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 24-09-2012 08:02
Message de pepito03 posté le 24-09-2012 à 00:53:53 (S | E | F)
Bonjour! (:
Pouvez-vous m'aider à corriger mon travail s'il vous plaît ?
Merci pour vos réponses.
Le sujet: Do you think that parents should interfere with their children's decisions? (in 300 words)
consigne:
1/ Ne répondez pas à la question dès l'introduction.
2/ Dans le développement, vous devez nuancer votre propos et donner des exemples.
I think that every parent ask themselves the same question and I also think that there's no good answer but we all have different points of view on this topical subject, so here's mine.
Firstly, I am well aware that it's great to have advices from people who have experience. If parents don't force their children to follow what they said, this can be really benefic for them, especially when they need to take important decisions like for example: the decision of keeping or not a baby when the daughter is pregnant while she's just in high school. Secondly, I'm totally agreed with the fact that parents have to participate in their children's life but they have to keep their privacy. Sometimes parents don't respect that. They try to control their children's life so much, that they come to a point where they can't speak to each other anymore without arguing. So personally, I am convinced that parents shouldn't interfere with their children's decisions. I think that parents should let their children live their life, make their own mistakes and take their independence little by little so that they will be ready for their future, without their parents behind them. Anyway, when the children will come to their majority, they will have to leave the house of their parents and live their own life and their parents cannot avoid this.
In conclusion, parents are important in children life. They need to have advice from their parents even if they choose to not follow them. They need to feel accompanied and not watched. Parents need to trust their children. They have to let them take their own decisions, without letting them fall.
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 24-09-2012 08:02
Réponse: Devoir/correction de bernard02, postée le 24-09-2012 à 02:43:25 (S | E)
Bonjour,
j'ai déjà noté quelques fautes, me semble-t-il, que je vous ai repérées en rouge. Attention, je n'ai pas un niveau d'expert, ce n'est peut-être pas exhaustif, ou j'ai pu me tromper. Mais vous pouvez commencer par regarder ces quelques points et nous renvoyer une nouvelle version modifiée, en attendant les avis complémentaires des experts.
I think that every parent ask themselves the same question and I also think that there's no good answer but we all have different points of view on this topical subject, so here's mine.
Firstly, I am well aware that it's great to have advices (invariable) from people who have experience. If parents don't force their children to follow what they said, this can be really benefic for them, especially when they need to take important decisions like for example: the decision of keeping or not a baby when the daughter is pregnant while she's just in high school. Secondly, I'm totally agreed (peut être formulé autrement) with the fact that parents have to participate in their children's life but they have to keep their privacy. Sometimes parents don't respect that. They try to control their children's life so much, that they come to a point where they can't speak to each other anymore without arguing. So personally, I am convinced that parents shouldn't interfere with their children's decisions. I think that parents should let their children live their life, make their own mistakes and take their independence little by little so that they will be ready for their future, without their parents behind them. Anyway, when the children will come (futur derrière will) to their majority, they will have to leave the house of their parents and live their own life and their parents cannot avoid this.
In conclusion, parents are important in children life. They need to have advice from their parents even if they choose to not (ordre) follow them. They need to feel accompanied and not watched. Parents need to trust their children. They have to let them take their own decisions, without letting them fall.
Bon courage.
Réponse: Devoir/correction de kolimang, postée le 24-09-2012 à 11:03:32 (S | E)
Bonjour,
J'ajoute quelques petits points :
I think that every parent ask (accord à la 3e personne du singulier avec "every") themselves the same question and I also think that there's no good answer (je pense que "right answer" conviendrait mieux) but we all have different points of view on this topical subject, so here's mine.
... it's great to have (I would use "get") advice from people who have (gained) experience.
In French, on prend une décision, while in English you make a decision.
... and their parents cannot avoid (I'd use "prevent", but I'm not sure it's better) this.
In conclusion, parents are important in children life. They (at first glance, "They" seems to refer to "parents" because the subject of the previous sentence is "parents") need to have advice from their parents ...
... without letting them fall (traduction littérale du français qu'il me semble n'avoir jamais rencontrée en anglais ; voyez le point 13 de l'entrée "tomber (intr. verb)" dans ce dictionnaire en ligne : Lien internet
)
Réponse: Devoir/correction de lucile83, postée le 24-09-2012 à 11:44:38 (S | E)
Hello,
I think that every parent ask themselves the same question and I also think that there's no good answer
I would say:
I think all the parents wonder about that subject,and I also think we can't give any proper answer. As we all have different points of view, here is mine.
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