Correction/extrait d'exposé
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Message de lesentier posté le 03-04-2021 à 22:58:00 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous
Si une bonne âme lit ce message,pourrait-elle regarder s'il y a des erreurs de syntaxe ou d'orthographe dans le texte ci-dessous que j'ai rédigé pour le passage d'un exposé ?
Ce texte traite d'un projet d'association de collecte et de revente de vêtements.
Mille remerciement d'avance
"Hello everybody!
Before to deals with our charity in depth, we would like draw you attention about several sad realities (whose we are all a bit responsible...).
Just in France, in 30kgs of news clothes byed (the average for a french woman and in one year), less 2.5kgs will be then recycled. We think that it's little. Whorse ever: the clothes that we purchase are very in minority composed of organic fleece (like you can see on this graphic from Reverse Ressources).
We do not to do a long lesson on environement, but simply take into consideration the environmental AND socials problems that product create! For instance, you can see here the pic of sewing workshop from [grande marque de vêtement français commençant par un K], whose, for clarification, the "office of social and environmental compliance" is located in Hong-Kong, China...
Obviously, there are a lot of french firms in manufactures of clothes, but given that these factories pay more tax, renumerate properly his employees, and made his clothes with a quality material, these clothes are not afferdable for all people.
We want ot do a triple aid: to collect clothes, to selle these clothes, and assemble fund."
Message de lesentier posté le 03-04-2021 à 22:58:00 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous
Si une bonne âme lit ce message,pourrait-elle regarder s'il y a des erreurs de syntaxe ou d'orthographe dans le texte ci-dessous que j'ai rédigé pour le passage d'un exposé ?
Ce texte traite d'un projet d'association de collecte et de revente de vêtements.
Mille remerciement d'avance
"Hello everybody!
Before to deals with our charity in depth, we would like draw you attention about several sad realities (whose we are all a bit responsible...).
Just in France, in 30kgs of news clothes byed (the average for a french woman and in one year), less 2.5kgs will be then recycled. We think that it's little. Whorse ever: the clothes that we purchase are very in minority composed of organic fleece (like you can see on this graphic from Reverse Ressources).
We do not to do a long lesson on environement, but simply take into consideration the environmental AND socials problems that product create! For instance, you can see here the pic of sewing workshop from [grande marque de vêtement français commençant par un K], whose, for clarification, the "office of social and environmental compliance" is located in Hong-Kong, China...
Obviously, there are a lot of french firms in manufactures of clothes, but given that these factories pay more tax, renumerate properly his employees, and made his clothes with a quality material, these clothes are not afferdable for all people.
We want ot do a triple aid: to collect clothes, to selle these clothes, and assemble fund."
Réponse : Correction/extrait d'exposé de laure95, postée le 04-04-2021 à 10:19:51 (S | E)
Bonjour,
- Before to deals: après before, mettre le verbe au gérondif ( verbe + terminaison -ing) with our charity in depth (mal dit),
- we would like (préposition)draw you (you n'est pas un possessif ) attention
- Just in France, in (pas la bonne préposition) 30kgs of news (pas de s à un adjectif)clothes byed (tu buy est un verbe irrégulier)(the average for a french (majuscuke)woman and in one year), less (than) 2.5kgs will be then recycled.
- We do not to do: mal conjugué.
- socials (pas de s) problems that product (pluriel) create!
- there are a lot of french (majuscule)firms in manufactures of clothes,
- more tax: pluriel.
- renumerate properly his (pas le bon possessif, une entreprise n'est pas une personne) employees, and made his clothes
- with a quality material: ordre des mors.
- afferdable: faute de frappe?
- for all people: mal dit.
- to selle: orthographe
Réponse : Correction/extrait d'exposé de lesentier, postée le 04-04-2021 à 15:00:16 (S | E)
Merci beaucoup pour votre réponse
Bonne journée à vous!Réponse : Correction/extrait d'exposé de gerold, postée le 04-04-2021 à 18:14:38 (S | E)
Bonjour lesentier
(whose we are all a bit responsible...) responsable de : responsible for, "dont" ne se traduit pas toujours par "whose".
We think that it's little plutôt it's not much. Whorse orthographe, et c'est un superlatif, pas un comparatif ever: the clothes that we purchase are very in minority ne se dit pas ; traduisez "seule une petite partie etc ..." composed of organic fleece (like as you can see on this graphic from Reverse Ressources).
environ
We want ot faute de frappe do
Réponse : Correction/extrait d'exposé de bluestar, postée le 04-04-2021 à 21:26:09 (S | E)
Bonsoir..
"renumerate"....orthographe
'Ressources ---idem
Réponse : Correction/extrait d'exposé de lesentier, postée le 06-04-2021 à 15:06:52 (S | E)
Merci à tous! Bonne semaine!
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